Someone Parked a Tree Behind Me.

So. I backed into a tree today. In my own yard. I’m sure it wasn’t there yesterday. It was a shock for all of us! My first thought was, “Who parked behind me?!! Dan’s at work, (Thank the Lord.) and we don’t have any company.” Then I looked. (I probably should have done that first….) Somebody parked a TREE behind me!! I mean, really, who does that kind of thing?

Next problem – to tell Dan, or not to tell him… hmmm. It would be a much easier decision if I didn’t four little tattle tales in the car with me. Three of them who thought we were just in a terrible wreck. “Mom!” Zackary says, “I bet there’s a BIG dent in the back of the van!” I very calmly said, “Zack, sometimes it’s better if you just keep your mouth SHUT. And, this is one of those times. Mommy doesn’t need to hear things like that right now.” I mean, if there is a huge dent in the van, how am I supposed to explain to my insurance that I can’t remember WHERE the trees are in my OWN yard? I’ve only lived here 8 years after all…..

I decided to get out and survey the damage. I couldn’t see any. Whew. Maybe I won’t have to tell Dan that I hit the huge tree he must have just planted in our yard last night while I was sleeping. Of course Dan sees things on cars that not even a person with a microscope can see. He’ll say to me, “Honey, how did that scratch get on the car?” “What scratch?” I innocently reply. “You haven’t seen it?” He says incredulously. We then go out and look. He points and I look. “What scratch?” I ask again. He just shakes his head.

I didn’t see any damage on the van, but that doesn’t mean he won’t. I better just fess up. If I don’t, the kids will do it for me. Or, just the mere fact that I’m writing this on the internet, chances are it will leak back to him. I did check to make sure the back end still opens and closes!

I regained my composure and finally, successfully got out of the yard. As we drove down the street Zackary pipes up, “Wow! I can’t believe the airbags didn’t go off!” I tried to keep my composure. Really I did. If you’ve ever ran into anything you know what it does to your nerves.  Everything in me wanted to turn around and scream, “JUST SHUT UP!!!” But, that wouldn’t have been very Christ like, and we’re not allowed to say “shut up” at our house….

Besides that fact, I was backing out of my yard, maybe going a top speed of 5mph. The jolt of smacking the tree was a shock, but nowhere near setting off the airbags. I counted to 10 and through gritted teeth said, “Zack that was another one of those things that should have been left unsaid….” “I can’t help it, Mom,” He said. He just doesn’t know when to quit.

I had lunch with Dan today, but I decided that wasn’t the right time to tell him about the non-dent in the back of the van, that I put there backing into a tree in my own yard. Maybe tonight after I fix his favorite meal and clean out the garage for him….. Yes, that might be a good time.