Trail Riding in the Mountains

On our vacation we did three death defying activities. We faced a mama bear with her cubs, we went white water rafting, and we went on a trail ride. The trail ride definitely being the scariest of the three!

I'm scared of horses. I'm not talking about the kind of fear I wrote about here. I'm talking about an extreme respect kind of fear. Now don't get me wrong, beautiful horses out in a lush green field, behind a nice white fence, don't bother me in the least. In fact in my imaginary farm I would probably own a few.

I'm very afraid of riding horses. The last time I rode was well over 20 years ago. I was scared to death and didn't see a need to put myself in that situation again. I like things with motors that I can control.

For some strange reason when we were planning our trip, trail riding through the Smoky Mountains on a horse sounded romantic...... (It's not, just so you know.) We decided to give it a try. I mean, really, how scary can a trail horse be?

I looked up several venues for trail riding and found one that boasted of "big man horses." I have a big man, so I thought it was a good fit. We arrived first thing in the morning and were the only ones in line for trail riding. It was a beautiful spring morning in the mountains. The only non beautiful part was that I was about to get on a horse.

We went out to the barn while the man saddled our horses. Then I saw them, the big man horses. Whoa. They were big. Over 6 feet at the shoulder. And he was saddling TWO of them. There was only two of us. I quickly asked, "Don't you have any Shetland Ponies?" The man laughed. He thought I was kidding. I wasn't. I wanted something my feet could touch the ground, and I could walk along while riding.

To my great relief he did have another horse for me. Not a Shetland Pony, but not Goliath either. He pulled her up to me and said, "This is Killer." And then he laughed again. He thought he was funny. I didn't. They must not have frightened customers very frequently.

There were signs everywhere (for the amateurs like me) that said, "Saddles don't keep you on the horse, you must balance!" "What kind of deal is that?" I thought." I want a saddle that ties me to this animal!" Then in our prep talk, the guide said, "There is a section of trail on the side of the mountain where there is no railing. We've never had  a horse step off before....." Before now! I was sure Killer and I were going over the side of that mountain!

I was ready to get off the horse, except I had no clue how to get down. So, we headed up the mountain. Killer didn't like being behind....anyone. She wanted to lead the pack. We were the second horse in the line, and she spent the whole time with her nose touching the lead horse's patushy. And the lead horse had gas. Bad gas. (I don't make this stuff up, people!) Hence the non romantic part of trail riding. The ambiance of horse gas is NOT romantic. At all. I spent a lot of my time trying to hold her back just so I could get some fresh air.

I did end up actually enjoying riding the horse. It was not nearly as scary as I remembered. And we didn't even step off the mountain! I was thinking that I might could get into this horse riding stuff after all. Then I stepped off the horse and walked bow legged for the next hour. Nah....It's not worth it.

Turns out my horse's name was actually Little Kentucky.....