I Can Drop It

If I can pick it up, I can drop it.

Take the large tub of margarine for example. You know the one I shouldn't be eating because margarine is extremely bad for you and can clog your arteries. And I'm sure multiple other things. But, I do love it, so I keep it around. Anyway, I picked it up off the counter and promptly dropped it on the floor. Because that's what I do, I drop things. Margarine makes a great mound of greasy mass on the tile. Of course Elijah was in the kitchen with me, so I had to hurry and clean it before he spread it. Playing in a mound of margarine is way better than Play Doh! There's really no fast way to clean up margarine. And if you get it all over your hands like I did, it's even slower. I guess I better invest in some Draino now....

Dan knows I drop things and he loves me anyway. In fact he loves me so much he bought me the military grade cell phone. You know the one you can drop in the toilet and it will survive. Or you can throw it off the roof of the house and it will still ring..... I'm on my second one now. The first one did fine until I lost it in the car.

 I was showing a car on our car lot and had opened the hood to show the engine. When I tried to to close the hood, it wouldn't close. So, I slammed it harder, and harder, and HARDER. When the customers left I couldn't find my phone. I knew I had it when they got there.... I searched and searched. I did find it. (Which I think I should get little credit for because I'm not very good at finding things either.) There it was in the hood of the car, jammed nicely.

Phones seem to be my favorite thing to drop. We're on our third set of handsets at home. That's about 8 or 9 phones I've been through. Dan's seriously considering stock options.... Me, I'm thinking we should put more padding on the floor....

So, the day Dan called me from the bathroom and said, "You'll never believe what I just did!" is a day I will always look back on with fondness.  "I just flushed the phone down the toilet," he said in disbelief. (Dan is ultra responsible and never does anything like this.) "You didn't even TRY to save it?" I said. (Secretly rejoicing that it wasn't me giving this confession.)  "There was no saving it," was his reply.

We even tried calling the phone to see if it was in the pipes.......

Maybe going back to the day of phones on short cords is not such a bad idea!