Raising Roses

Kids. What a little word. What a big responsibility. Raising kids is the hardest thing I’ve ever done in my life. I thought about using the words “most challenging” for that last sentence, but “hardest” seems more appropriate. Sometimes when I write something funny about my children it’s to help me keep my sanity!

There are so many things I want to get right in raising these little people I’ve been entrusted with. I know I won’t get everything right because we live in a fallen world. But, I want to pick the most important things.

One of those things that I deem as “most important” is encouraging a child to grow in the interests God has given them. There are things we choose to like, and then there are those things we are born to like. You can’t help it and no one can take it away.

I have two little sisters whose artwork puts me to shame. I can’t draw a decent stick figure to save my life! But they, they breathe art in many forms. And it’s gorgeous. My parents recognized their “interests” from God, built them two art rooms, and have invested many dollars into their training. I want to be that. I want to see what God has given my children and help make it happen.

I read an advice column in a Christian magazine where a dad had written in about his son. He said that he had a son that was so interested in sports that it trumped everything else. No one else in the family was into sports at all, and this particular dad thought that sports were, perhaps, a bit evil. He thought he should pull him away from everything sports, and immerse him in what the family was interested in. The advice given to this man was this: “Buy a glove, and get out there and play with him before you lose your son.”

I totally got it. I like sports after all. There’s nothing evil about them as long as God is still first in your life. If your kid has a bent towards sports, let him play. Made perfect sense to me.

Let me introduce you to MY son. He is 9. He eats, sleeps, and breathes electronics. He has since the time he was born.

When he was very young he was fascinated with movies. I didn’t have so much of a problem with this except that he couldn’t pronounce the word “movie” for YEARS!!! Yes, I mean years!!! He said it, “booby.” Mom, “I want to watch a booby,” he would say.  It was ok at home, but he said it EVERYWHERE!!! I would gently correct him, “Say mmmooovviieee Zack.” He would say, bbbooooobbbyyyyy. We were at a friend’s birthday party when he was about 5. As the birthday child was opening her gifts I noticed all the moms were laughing and looking at me. I realized my son was saying excitedly, “Look! She got a cartoon booby, she got a cartoon booby!” What they found amusing, I found quite embarrassing.

He has since added computers, cameras, ipods, kindles, and video games to his list of interests. (He also now calls movies by their rightful name. Thank the Lord.)

I dislike electronics for the most part. I could live easily without a television. I’m sure video games are evil, and I couldn’t tell you the difference between an ipod and a smart phone. (Except I do know the smart phone makes calls…)

We were at a restaurant the other day and I pulled out my printed out coupon for the waiter. (I DO know how to print!) He came back to our table and asked if I might be willing to bring up the coupon on my phone for clarification. I looked at him innocently and said, “I don’t have internet on my phone.” He looked at me as if he didn’t know how to respond and said, “I’ll go talk to my manager.” I could just imagine him saying to his manager, “Sir, I think they must be Amish.” He should have been grateful that I actually have a cell phone!

This is me. I don’t understand my son. I want to tell him that electronics are bad, and he should have other interests. I could give him lots of suggestions. But, it’s in him. He has a bent and a talent towards those things. (I’m sure he could tell you the difference between a smart phone and an ipod. And we don’t own either!) Reality is, he probably will have a job electronically related.

Part of my frustration is that I am at a loss as to how to help him. Being a part of his life means I have to stretch out of my comfort zone. I may actually have to learn how a computer works. I don’t want to give him every electronic out there and say, “Go have fun.” I want to guide him to use his talents for God’s glory. I want to help him develop skills to get that great job he’s going to need some day. I want to be a part of who God made him. And for this I pray, “God, please help me.” 

Each one of our children has talents. I try every day to "notice" the talents in mine. A rose is a rose no matter what you do, but if you water it, give it sunlight, and maybe even a little Miracle Grow there's a good chance it will be a prize winning rose. I want prize winning children. God has given me the opportunity to help them get there. I plan to take it. Who's with me?!